On training Lolo and Lola and the extended family.

Isaac is the first grandchild in the family. He is also the first great-grandchild in the family. Of course, it's a big, big deal, and everybody is extremely excited. But the newest little member also heralds in a shift in the family dynamics.

My parents were the family pioneers, being the first on both sides to settle here in the US. They started from scratch and without an extended family to rely on, raised my sister and I and even worked on getting their own siblings here. As Tina and I start our own family, my parents are only now learning to relinquish their heads of household roles.

I am eternally grateful for and respectful of all they have done for us. So, it's been a little difficult for me to put them in their place a few times.


My mom's been a NICU (nursery intensive care unit) nurse for over twenty years. She's seen it all when it comes to births, from the good to the bad. Understandably, she wanted to be present for the birth of her first grandchild. She was itching to be in the fray of it all! Tina's mom too. She was a midwife in the Philippines and a retired nurse here.

As thankful as we were to have the support of these two loving matriarch's in the labor room, Tina and I were also very apprehensive of the potential chaos it could cause. You know, the whole too many cooks in the kitchen...too many captains on the boat. So from the get go, Tina and I set the rules: OBSERVERS ONLY UNLESS otherwise needed!

Tina's mom was not able to come down, but I still had to put my mom in check a little bit. When we found out that Tina was gonna go in for a C-Section, my mom went straight to the O.R. nurse, who happened to be a friend of hers, to ask if she could go into the O.R. too. Before the nurse could respond, I gave my mom a stern look and said "NO!" I know she was well-meaning, but she should have asked us first! Anyway, we had great faith in the hospital staff :)

When Tina was recovering and when Isaac was in the incubator, I had to officially declare a day of rest from family and friends. I have a pretty close extended family and when the family gets together, it's like being back in the bukid. Joking and yelling and generally a good time. Think BG of the barrio suite in one of our shows! But sometimes you need some peace and quiet! It was tough, but a few times I had to give the evil eye and shush a few of my aunts.

At one point, my sister called me to let me know that the relatives were talking about how they weren't used to being told what to do and how to act by one of the kids (me)! In the course of processing, they understood where I was coming from, but attributed it cultural difference (old school vs. new school).

At breakfast the other day, I apologized to my parents for the reprimands that I doled out while in the hospital. They told me that they understood, and it was ok. My mom told us that she had been relating (complaining) to her girlfriends about being kept in check by us. They laughed at her and said, "Welcome to the grandparents club!"

It was a good talk. I told 'em that we're glad that we can use them as a resource and know that they have a lot of experience and knowledge to share. We look forward to their advice, but because Tina and I want to do as much of this on our own as possible, only when asked for :)