12784 days and still counting

I live 35 miles away, parking spot to parking spot, from work. When there's no traffic, my average trip takes 35 minutes, which gives an average of 60 mph. I suppose that makes sense given some of the lights I go through off of the freeway.

In the mornings, I like to listen to KCBS 740. The all-talk radio keeps me up on traffice reports and main current events. In the afternoon, I listen to my ipod or CD's (after listening to KCBS for traffic updates).

Somedays, I prefer driving with the radio off, allowing the din of the wind and the zooming of cars to steer my thoughts. About a week ago, during one of those radio-off days, my musings meandered into thoughts of my upcoming birthday.

I'm not a big b-day celebrating guy. To me, birthday's are just another day. Now, I'm not being sour or indifferent about bdays. Nah, I would even say it's more the opposite. As hokey as it sounds, I'm such an optimistic, free-spirited, young at heart person that I try to celebrate everyday!

Anyway, during this drive, I realized that this year I would be turning 35. At that instant, for the first time in my life, a tingle of anxiety woke up and kick-started my rusted-out, under-used "I'm Getting Old" warning system. I've always said that I LOVE the thirties and that still holds true. But after 35, the next age-milestone is 40. I mean, you might as well skip 36, 37, 38, and 39! Those years just wither and crumble at the looming, domineering age of FORTY YEARS OLD. When I say 40, the color gray comes in mind. When I say 40, I envision graying hairs (which ARE popping up like weeds). When I say 40, I think Buick and Oldsmobile.

During that drive I really started to grasp the magnitude of my age. I wondered what the next five years would hold for me. I even started worrying if I would ever think of myself as "young" again.

Sure you can throw at me the cliches: "Age ain't nothing but a number" or "You're only as old as you feel" or "Yah but you're young at heart" or even "Hey – Glass full! Glass full! You're 40 years young!!". I hear ya and know too that those are all words I WILL live by. I will still strive to be young at heart, and I will still try to smile and laugh more than I smile and laugh now. And yes, the glass will still be half-full.

At 25, I would never have guessed that at 35, I still think of myself as 25. If the derivative of my attitude is 0, then when I'm 45, I should still think of myself as 25!

But still it's a fact. I am getting older.

There were 9 Leap Years from 1970 to 2005. Add to this the 26 regular years and by Friday, I will have lived 12784 days. [If you go strictly by the solar year (1 year = 365.25 days) then I will have lived 12783.75 days].

Time marches on ... 8)